Life's Kicking Me Down

Hey guys....today was not....good to say the least. My Dad and oldest brother found out that they will be jobless in three months time. Their factory is shutting down and moving to another state. My brother will be fine he's young and healthy....Dad is another thing though. He's pushing sixty and isn't healthy at all from years of heavy drinking and smoking...I doubt anyone will hire him..he know's that and we know that. I have never seen my Dad look so lost and beaten down as he did today. It just broke my heart to see him like that. I know that things will be okay though him and my mother have a good savings, he'll get a severance, and he's put into a retirement plan the entire time he's been there which has been for over 35 years.

On to my weigh in... I weighed in at 185. So that's a pound lost. I didn't weigh right this morning because I got the call about my family and ran out the house in a hurry so I'd eaten before I weighed...so I'm not really counting this weigh in.

I'm just in to much of a blah state. On top of my Dad and brother's news today, I never heard back about the job I thought I had. I went to two interviews for this place with two different managers and both seemed to like me and I really thought that I had it by the way they talked but I never heard from them and they told me they'd call yesterday. So today was once again spent putting in applications.

Annnnd.....my husband has put in over 90 hours at work this week alone. He has work since March 21st and will not have a day off until April 4th!!! I hate that he's killing himself working this much overtime. He works 12 hour shifts and twice this week alone he's work two 16 hour shifts. I miss him dearly and can't wait for his month 7 day break....that's one of the things I love about his job once a month they get seven days in a row off from the way their schedules work. Oh and did I mention that he works swing shifts? Nights one week days the next.

As you can tell I am in the dumps. Majorly!

DOWN A PANT SIZE!!

Kind of...LoL I went to Old Navy the other day to get some new shorts. All of my old ones from last year wear XXLs or XLs and they were all a lil baggy on me..the XLs not as bad. Well I decided to try on the Ls and I am so friggin happy that they fit amazingly and actually got baggy after about a couple hours wearing them...

Also all my bras I am having to wear at their tightest adjustment which is amazing because I refused to go above a 40D so the last time I bought bras (right after Christmas) they were all....a little tooo tight. But they are getting loose and it feels so great.

I've not weighed myself lately because I haven't been working out since the 17th because real life things have been getting in the way. I've been busy with the job hunt and interviews, babysitting, other family stuff, and such. Hopefully tomorrow I get a phone call saying I get the job that I went to the THIRD interview for today.

Even though I haven't worked out...although I did go in tonight for 45 mins, I have been active and we haven't ate fast food but 2 to 3 times these past two weeks. I've been cooking. Also, I have been active and on the go constantly. So I hope that when I weigh in this Friday my scale reads less then 186...I don't care what it reads as long as it's less then that!!

Wel that's all for now..I promise to get back into posting almost daily life has just been a little hectic. I've missed my lil blog it keeps me motivated and accountable for how hard I push myself. Well I'm off to relax for a bit then do some yoga before bed....g'night all!

Catching Up

Hey guys I kind of fell off the wagon this weekend with friends visiting and concerts and everything. I'm going t get back at it the rest of this week and hopefully will not see a gain. But if I do I'll know why and will try harder to stick to my guns the next time something like this weekend comes up. Will post more tomorrow night guys!

Weekend Photo Update!

Hey guys my weekend was full full full.  Here's a quick run down!

Friday: Missed weigh in...but I am still at 186..okay with that there wasn't a gain. Went to movis with the hubs,niece, and one of our friends.

me on right

Saturday: Went with all our friend to see a love metal-Christian band. And visited with some friends that were home out of town.

I'm the shortest in this photo lol..this is the band and all of us (they're called A Hero Remains)

Sunday: Went to the Smokey's with my hubs, our friend KEith, and my sister in law and her family.

in back of Jeep

rock slide that took up half the road

left: Keith...right: hubs elbow lol

Oh and on Thursday I worked on my flower bed..haven't got the flowers in yet but thsi is what's done!

Well that's it for now I need to go work on getting back on track with my weight loss. Love you guys! Buh-byes!

Tired

Quick up date...spent the day shoveling rocks and mulch in my flower bed. I am tired and sunburned so will not be going to the gym but I think after hours working with the rocks and mulch..I should be okay hahah. Will do a more in depth up date tomorrow. Good night and sweet dreams!

...I will do my nightly yoga though!

Loooooong Day

Today was sooo long but so good! We got up to 80 here today. I spent the day with the hubs and his sister and her kids. We started working in our rock garden to be. We decided to put plastic and weed barrier down and then we're going to top it with rocks. I'm going to try to get some hens and chicks to grow in it. I've got plenty of drift wood my uncle and I collected last year when the water was down low at the lake so going to put that in there as well.

hens and chicks!!

We only got the plastic and weed barrier down today we're going to price rocks tomorrow at a couple of places and will hopefully get it tomorrow. After that he went with our brother-in-law to visit a friend that had just had surgery. I stay at his sister's and played with the kids. The youngest one kept getting on my shoulders (I was sitting down bouncing was afraid to stand with her on my shoulders). I think it wore her out though....she later passed out on my arm one minute she's yapping then the next she's drooling on me.

poor J-baby

We finally came home. He decided to play xbox and I decided to hit the gym. Did 30 mins of cardio on the elliptical and 10 mins core and 30ish of weight lifting. So I'm worn out going to shower do my night time yoga and go pass out myself! 

Good night and sweet dreams everyone!

Walking in the Park

Had an awesome day with my niece she's close in age to me so we click really well. We went out to eat where I had some grilled chicken, baby carrots, and broccoli casserole. She had a HUGE piece of chocolate cake with ice cream and whipped topping; we had no idea it was so large so she kept trying to get me to eat some of it..I was like um nah..... I feel the calories creeping in just staring at it. We then went to the park and walked for a bit enjoying the sunshine and green grass. My feet are killing me though I wasn't expecting to go the park since we just randomly decided to go out and so I was wearing flip flops that gave me blisters right under my toes ugh!!

I'm excited about tomorrow too! Me and the hubs is going to do some yard work and start fixing up my flower bed. Since we moved here I haven't really done anything with it because it's mostly clay but I'm going to try putting down potting soil then mulch and see what I can get to grow! I'll try to remember to do before and after photos. Also me and my niece are planning on going back to the park we may even decide to take yoga mats and find a corner of the park to do yoga in!

BYE BYE FOR NOW! I've got house work to do and still need to go work out!

Better Hit the Gym

 Hey guys! I'm feeling so much better than I had the last couple of days. Still got a little bit of a cough and     a stuffy nose but nothing to bad. So I'm going to hit the gym hard tonight. I just finished about 10-15 mins of yoga. I did some strength building and flexibility poses. I've got to work extra hard this week to make up for this weekend of barely working out and spending most of my time in bed sick.

Tonight's plan....elliptical for 35 mins, rowing machine 5-10, seated rope climb 5-10, and cycle for 20-30 mins. Tomorrow night I'll do weight lifting and some form of cardio.

So what did I do today? Well let's see I woke up super early like 4 am early so I watched some TV, did some laundry, about noon-ish I took a short nap. When I got up went out with my MIL (mother in law....she's a big part of my life so you'll most likely see more about her later) we went to the mall got pedicures, checked out the new theater that just opened here, and then we went to eat. I had water and a 6oz steak with steamed broccoli...and two cheese sticks because she ordered them and wanted me to eat some with her. That's the only thing I've had today so will have a late snack before I hit the gym so I have time to digest before bed. After we ate we went and she got a new lawn mower which I will most likely be the one using..it's a push she has a riding one but I never learned how to use one and pushing's better any ways.

So that's the 411 on my day. How was yours? Hope everyone's doing great in all of their weight loss endeavors! Laters!!

I just thought this was pretty!

35 is not 0

Hey guys! I'm still pretty sick. I finally passed out early this morning and slept until noonish. I stayed in bed most of the day I felt so bad, and I had decided not to go to the gym even though I vowed I would. However, about 6:30 as I was lying in my misery my conscious kicked in and told me to get up and that I could do it. So up I got and on with the gym clothes and out the door I went. I was only able to do 35 mins of cardio 15 on cycle and 20 on the elliptical. By far no where near the intensity or the duration I would normally do and I was kind of bummed, but I told myself 35 mins is a lot better then 0 mins and every little bit helps. I was feeling a little spunky when I got home so did some relaxing yoga for about 15 mins. I'm hoping tomorrow I can get in my full hour of cardio though and by Monday be able to do my strength training. I stopped on my way home and stocked up on tissues and meds so that should help.

Sniffle Sniffle

I have felt so poohy the last two days the only exercise I've done has been yoga. I just feel to bad. My body is achy, throat is scratchy, nose is runny and for some reason burns when cold air hits it, my eyes are so watery it looks like I'm constantly crying, and I feel like there's a hundred lbs of pressure in my head. Whatever this is has hit suddenly and out of the blue. I went to my grandmothers was eating and noticed my throat was a little "off" by the time I left a few hours later most of the above symptoms had hit me. I think it's because of the weather being warm one day cold the next and the fact that I can't sleep to save my life. I'm dead tired right now but if I try to go to sleep I just toss and turn. I hope I get over this soon. I vow to go to the gym tomorrow no matter how krappy I feel.

Measurements & Weigh In

Last Months Measurements:

Bust: 40C (I'm just going to use my bra sizes to track this
Bicep: 14 in
Forearm: 11 in
Waist: 47 in
Hips: 48 in
Thigh: 28 in
Calf: 16 in

Current Measurements:

Bust: 40C same
Bicep: 14 in same (I have noticed it's not as jiggly anymore)
Forearm: 10 in  -1 in loss
Waist: 44 -3 in loss ( this surprised me I thin a lot of it was bloating)
Hips: 45 -3 in loss (yay!)
Thigh: 27 -1 in loss
Calf: 16 same


Total Inches Lost 8in!!!

Starting Weight: 195
Current Weight: 186

Total Weight Lost 9lbs!!


HOW I'm Feeling......


Well in about a months time I've lost only 9 lbs? That's little less then I expected, but at the same time I wasn't expecting to lose 8 ins across my body either so it equals out. I am happy with it. I know where improvements need to be made and what I need to work on to get better results next month.


Sorry I'm not writing this more energetically..I'm coming down with a cold had a sore throat, runny nose, and think I'm starting to run a fever. So that's it for tonight...good night and best wishes for whatever you are trying to accomplish in this life!!

Yogi

Hey guys just a quick update before I'm off to bed for the night....yes it is actually 5:25am here but once again...I get into my husband's sleep pattern and he works swing shifts; this week was the night shift...anyways!

I just wanted to tell you guys that I am absolutely in love with yoga and am now considering myself to be a new yogi. I am researching it as much as I can and today bought the book Slim Calm Sexy Yoga by Tara Stiles.

It is amazing. It tells you in description all the major yoga moves and gives you a series of yoga flows that do different things such as clear skin, help with insomnia (which I'm getting ready to do as soon as I'm finished with this post), depression, and many more. I love this book and it's going to be my little carry around for the foreseeable future. 

Well that's it for now. See you soon!

Happy vs Fatty

I was just reading a post by Maren over at From Cow to Wow and it got me thinking long and hard about how I have felt about myself and how happy this weight loss journey has made me when I've only reached such small successes so far.

Before I started this journey and even in past attempts I was a very negative person. Looking back now I see a lot about myself I don't like and a lot of that stemmed from being overweight and unhappy with myself.

Before I began:
I was moody
I felt unattractive
I slept all day
I was lazy
I had no desire
I picked fights with my husband
I was jealous of people who weren't over weight
I ate like a slob
I had horrible cycles
I couldn't accept compliments because I thought they were false
I was hateful a lot for no reason

Now:
My mood has improve 100%
I feel attractive even though I've only lost 9lbs it's more me now then my physical appearance
I only sleep 6-8hrs although it is still sporadic because my husband works swing shift
I get up and do more
I've got plenty of desire he may even say too much!
I'm not picking fights for no reason anymore
I'm not jealous because I know I'll be prouder having to work for it
Cycles are not as bad now (only had two since starting though)
I take compliments as truths
I'm a happy smiley person

My only personality flaw I can see right now is that because I am loving this so much I am trying to push it on loved ones or friends who may not care for it so much!


Some may say I was weak because I let being fat control my happiness but I say I am strong because I recognize that now and it is not an issue anymore.

Pre-Weigh In Weigh In

Okay so my official weigh in isn't until Friday now but I got on the scale today and was so excited about the number I just have to share!!

Last weigh in 2 weeks ago: 190
Today's unplanned weigh in: 186!!

I still plan to do my weigh in on Friday and measurements I was just so exitced to see that number I jumped for joy! Maybe Friday I'll be at 185!

Also something else I thought I should share. When I started this journey I bought a cheap scale and I know it is off a little bit because I've weighed myself at the gym, but I decided to stick with it now for a couple of reasons. First off, it's the one I started with and it may not be 100% or even 90% accurate however it is accurate enough to show if I've lost or gained. It's not digital so it doesn't show percents...which for me is okay I've said before I don't want to obsess about the scale I use it only as a guide for a general idea of where I'm at. I may change this later on but for now I'm happy with my nondigital cheapie!

First Time Yoga-ing

Well I gave yoga a try and I must say I think it's going to be something I add to my daily routine. I've been going through youtube videos trying to find one I thought I could do. Here's the one I did tonight and found it very relaxing yet there are a couple of moves that I was like what my body don't bend that way! I'm going to be doing some more research tonight later on.

I was amazed at how much tension I released in my shoulders. Another thing I like about this is as I do it I will notice results much faster by how far I can stretch or how some moves become easier for me to do.

While on the subject of yoga...I hope to someday be this skilled and strong. This video is amazing and so inspiring so please watch!

Girls Lift Too!!

Okays so I went to the gym tonight and it was my lifting night... I do 5-6 days of cardio and 2 days where I lift hitting all the major muscle groups...any ways. I was doing my rounds of the weight machines and I noticed the two younger guys kept watching me. I didn't pay them any attention at first but then I notice that when I would leave a machine they'd make they're way to it. Eventually I realized they were going and looking at how much weight I was using on the machine....I was like "WHAT THE CRAP THAT"S CREEPY!"

So all I have to say is...hey guys women lift too. No I'm not trying to bulk up; I'm building lean muscle to burn more calories and to look good naked...thank you and good bye!

Tired

Ahhhh! So tired today did not hardly sleep a wink last night..I think I finally fell asleep sometime after the sun came up! This may be due to the fact that my husband and his buddies decided to play ghost hunters last night and so every shadow had me jumping.....heheh anyways!

I didn't workout yesterday because I had to babysit, then went and visited with my mother in law, and then spent time with the hubs since last night was his only day off this week. I did spend about an hour chasing a four year old around outside and played one legged hop scotch over him when he tried to run me over with a big wheel. I plan on getting a really good work out tonight though so it's okay..the body needs a day to rest every now and again.

Will be updating again soon until then good day, good night, or good morning!!

Frustrated

I am so disgusted over one part of this weight loss journey. I know I know I'm just starting out and if I try to change to much at once I won't be able to stick to it, but I can not stop obsessing about what I eat. I actually cried the other night because I ate a whole thin crust buffalo chicken pizza in one setting. This was mainly due to the fact that I hadn't ate all day and because of bad storms we had dinner later then normal. I felt like shit afterwards. I felt like a fat slob that couldn't push the food away. I always focus on the bad days and not the good. I know that little slip ups won't kill me that I have to be able to eat what I crave sometimes but every time I do I freak out that there's going to be a gain on the scale this week not a loss....and mentally I know better I have changed a lot about how I eat and I'm exercising at least 6 days a week sometimes 7. I just wish that I didn't have to think about it because it brings me down...but I guess it's part of the process and if I don't think about it I can't reach my goals. One good way to look at it though is if I'm worrying about it this much I really am committed to this journey and will one day see that goal weight!

To Weigh Or Not To Weigh

The votes are in and I have decide NOT to weigh in today for two reasons.

Reason #1

My husband works a swing shift and I get into his sleeping pattern. Right now I am getting up at 2-4 in the evenings and staying up til 8 or 9 in the mornings. I hate doing that so I am staying up today so I can go to bed TONIGHT. Therefore I have not had any sleep, and I only weigh myself after having 7-8 hours of sleep so that when I weigh in I am not weighing all the food and water I have consumed for the day.

Reason #2

Mother nature has deemed it to be my week. Therefore, my weight is naturally inflated a bit and would not be an accurate measure. So by delaying this week I can one change my weigh in day to Friday....doing it on Thursday just seems odd to me. And by changing my measurement week hopefully mother nature will be come and gone the next time I do my measurements!


So yeah that why I will not weigh in this week...would be nice to see 4-6 lbs off next week!

Any ways....I did go work out last night at 10:30pm-ish mostly cardio but a lot of leg work so I guess today I need to do some core and upper body. I'm not sure when I'll go workout though. Trying to decide the best time to go. I hate going when it's crowded....honestly I'll most likely be going here very soon so I can get there and out before it gets busy. I'm hoping if I go between 6-8 that everyone will be commuting to work, dropping the kids off, or still sleeping. Or should I just do an at home workout? I don't feel like those are as...rewarding. Yeah I'll go to the gym.


I haven't forgot I promised photos of my new sandals will take pictures as soon as suns up and will post later today! Tootles for now!